..and There It Is

Yep, it finally happened: The layoff. My company was good to me, but my boss had been telegraphing to me for a long time that if he could find a way to let me go he would. It wasn't like he was some evil guy, we were just different, and I was part of a legacy crew that he inherited when he took over our division. It is an old story, and probably the major surprise to anyone around, was that I somehow managed to stick around so long. I'm not 100% sure that is due to some strength of mine or perhaps just the willingness to endure.
But...the good news. This is my second layoff from the same company and the first time, in 1999, they caught me flat-footed with a mortgage and two teenage kids at home. Recovering from that, I vowed that no company would ever leave me like that again, and this time they caught me debt-free with a Plan B AND a Plan C. Life may not go as well I as I could like it to be but there will be some certain satisfaction, as a person with good flashlights and fresh batteries must feel when the power goes out for a long time.
I feel charged up myself and am ready for this really big adventure ahead...where do I see myself 5 years from now? Living a life of freedom that most people can only dream of...I hope!

Music Mining..

One of the greatest feelings is finding something that you thought was forever lost. I remember this really strange album from back in the 1970's and dug through my old album covers and there it was. Scratched and warped, I thought all was lost until I found that someone else liked them enough to upload videos and the songs to youtube. The Man In The Jar
Back then I didn't understand how this music made sense but was so different than what else I was hearing at the time. I found a wiki about the Sensational Alex Harvey Band and finally I learned what I needed to know: he had spent a lot of time working with the Theater musical: Hair. When you think of Hair, Jesus Christ Superstar and other rock music theater of the time, then the band's music makes much more sense. The music was created before we had music videos, but his music needed the visual element. I then found that Alex Harvey died in 1982 at 47 years of age. Maybe this is one of those examples where your work lives on after you die and it is possible that the new fans will appreciate the music more than the people of the 1970's...

The Audition

As I sit here half listening to this great guy get a group job interview from some of my colleagues, it strikes me as just how hard it must be to hit just the right note in an audition process. Come on as too friendly: you're annoying, come on as too quiet: you're not a team player. How could one person in a short time, satisfy this diverse group that probably would have trouble together on a bowling outing.
I'm thinking there is no right answer, no great applicant, just lucky accidents that somebody that is cheerful and outgoing gets interviewed by a group that appreciates those qualities. We are not talking about chops, what they bring to the table or anything but looks and personality at this point....makes me think of the many band auditions when you wonder if you were good enough or if you seemed too opinionated or too boring. Truth is, from what I'm seeing and hearing today, you just can't know. There could be five people in the group that think the applicant is the best ever, and one guy thinks, "This guy might be good enough to make me look bad..".
I'm going to remember this at my next audition: that it might truly be impossible to please everyone, and how hard do you really want to try to impress the Grumpy's of this world?

On The Edge Of The Seat

Ah, my favorite place to be: sitting on the edge of my seat. Nothing is settled, everything is ready, but nothing is in motion. It's like the time before a soccer match. Anything could happen today, but please don't let it end in PKs!
Sometimes it kind of sneaks up on me. I look in the mirror and this really old guy looks back at me, nothing much like the little kid that sat in his parent's bedroom, watching the clock and waiting for Santa to arrive. Yet, inside me, that kid is still there, excited about something coming, hoping it is the exciting thing I want, and not just clothes for school.
Actually, when I think about it, the best part of all this is that I still have the potential to get excited, and I am thankful. It all just stretches out like a road in front of me. Not sure where it's going, but I'm plenty interested to see what might be there....

Friday Night, March 14th at Friendly Confines

We have a gig (Rock City) that sounds like a really good time. This is actually my favorite part, savoring the possibilities, the crowd, hitting all the high notes, getting some of those fleeting moments of time on stage that actually are like a runner's high. The diner is a franchise, Friendly Confines, but the building used to McWells. I've never been there, but I've been told that the stage was designed with bands in mind, which is not always the case.
What I'm excited about is that it could be anything. I just watched a science show about "Free Will" and can see how this applies. I cannot control physics, or most things, but I can be as prepared as possible, and that is what I like to do. So, if it's an empty house or standing-room only, I'm ready. I hope you can be there....

Rock City and the Future of Things..

This photo is of me and the boys in Rock City, hanging out in a backroom before we went on stage for a really rare gig for us: playing at a wedding! And let me say, that was no ordinary wedding. The table centerpieces were replicas of silenced automatic pistols, with flowers in them and the groom was about my age, marrying a fairly young woman. Most of the attendees were supposed to be bikers, but truthfully, they seemed like any other group you might see at a wedding. I did notice that it did not take much booze for them to have a good time. It was a night that I will treasure. I only wish that my wife could have been there to see what I saw..
Life right now is truly that phrase: It was the best of times, it was the worst of times. I'm having a blast performing on stage and doing better at surfing than at any other time of my life. My Mom is sick and work just seems like they would rather not have any old guys working there. Actually all of these things make perfect sense when you stand back, but when you go through them minute by minute, it is not quite as thrilling. I still stand by my thought that the near future is a wide open as it was when I was looking at the end of college and had no idea if I would have a job, get married, have kids, any of it. For all I know right now, I'm looking at the day before I find out just what I'm really capable of in life, or I find out what it's like to be counting your pennies. It's not always exactly what I want to face, but it beats the hell out of BORING....

The Curse of Living in Interesting Times

A stupid boilerplate phrase to ask employees still haunts me from years ago, when Glen Miller, the then director of the Orange County Library system posed it for me during a review: Where do you see yourself 5 years from now?
I came back with the wrong rejoinder: Where do you see ME 5 years from now? His answer, doing the same thing you're doing now....
He was wrong, and he was wrong for both of us. The reason it still haunts me is because of how wrong he was.
I left my job of 22 years and left for a whole different field, working for a company that promised a revolving door of staff coming and going, and included in that promise that no matter what, it wasn't going to be boring.
Glen Miller? He ended up retiring soon after that, under fire from his board, and died from a heart attack only one year into his retirement. It was a huge lesson to me, that when we predict the future, we are mostly saying things will continue on just like they are now...even though we know better.
Essentially, the difference for 2014, is that I would not even dare to predict 6 months into the future. I really have no idea of what is coming except some exciting times, sleepless nights, and the sureness that no matter what...it won't be boring..