She had that look, as if she was able to transport Rodeo Dr into our small town. They built all of these fancy McMansions around us, the Beverly Hillbillies, and she was in her extra large Coach sunglasses, bleach blond hair, perfect body in a sports bra, running shorts and the leash on the Great Dane. One of the new McMansion occupants. You could guess her age, but you would be wrong. She was coming towards us on the sidewalk, upper lip already starting to curl as if she just stepped in something her dog might have left behind. Somehow I felt that look was for the three of us. There was the old bald-headed guy with no shirt and a big plastic garbage can with a nappy old towel hanging out, his petite wife, who was giving directions and curling her lip back at the blond, and the young carefree red-headed 20-something daughter, who wore clothes as an afterthought. The three of us were on a mission of great import, but I had the feeling that the blond could never understand. She could give money to the homeless, she could attend a ball to raise money for endangered species, but could she do this? Because, in that large garbage can, was a very large soft-shelled turtle that had somehow crawled up from the lake, looking for a place to lay eggs. She must have gone too far and tunneled under too many fences, and by the time we found her in our backyard she was trapped and worn out.
The only thing funnier than the looks between us and the Great Dane woman, was the scene of the three of us trying to capture a large snapping turtle. We did it though, and the bravest of us turned out to be the redhead, who figured that if you put a towel over the head of the turtle, she couldn't see to bite you. Once she was in the garbage can, it was just a 10 minute walk down the street to the canal, we we set her free, back in the water where she belonged.
I can only surmise what the blond would have thought if she knew there was a giant turtle in the garbage can..turtle stew for the neighbor's supper?
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